First an elevator joke: guy says to elevator repairman: how was your day? repairman says, oh it was up and down. bwahahahaha.
Elevators are the most awkward social experiment I have ever experienced. There is some unspoken agreement that people just go along with when it comes to elevators. If you are there first you get in first, of course after the previous occupants unload. Then you tell the person the floor you wish to disembark on and they have to press it. Even if your hands aren't occupied, they pressed the button first, they are now in charge of the panel of floors. It's their call. The person to first step up to or into the elevator has all the power and holds your life in their hands. Is that being a little too dramatic? I didn't think so. Also, if you enter first you are inevitably getting off first, which means you are stuck behind everyone that got on after you. That's just how these things, and Murphy's law, work.
Now that you are safely in the elevator, and you check to make sure you haven't randomly dropped your keys down the shaft, the awkwardness begins. For me at least. What do you do while shifting between floors? Stare up at the ceiling tiles, over to the side, god hopes there isn't a mirror in the elevator. What a cruel joke that was, putting mirrors in a small awkward elevator. Whose idea was that anyways? Do you slyly stare over to the other person hoping they don't notice to see if they secretly want to make some sort of contact? No? Quick look away! Maybe sigh a little bit. If the ride is longer than three floors, Jesus, I would rather walk. I really would. Very rarely do you make friends on an elevator. What do you say to the person when you unload? See you have a nice life, enjoy your ride, it was great riding with you?
There is a large percentage of time that I have spent on elevators making small talk, babbling nervously as I get off on my floor. This is usually in front of an attractive male. There is a small percentage of time where I actually manage to pay attention and get off on my floor. I have a bad habit of zoning out and blindly following people off the elevator. I then realize my mistake, twirl around in confusion, and decide to take the stairs the rest of the way. I announce this decision to the person staring oddly at me, and yes, it is normally an attractive, nice smelling male.
Oh, and to those people that press the buttons more than once, it doesn't help. It doesn't make the elevator move faster, I'm sorry to say but you just don't have that much power in life.
So this is why I choose to suffer up 6 flights of stairs. Not for the exercise or the well being of my heart, but because I'm awkward and nervous and you generally don't run into attractive nice smelling males who think you are just a little bit wierd.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Favorite moments from the Olympics
Now that my post party depression has set in, here are some of my Olympic moments that I loved. In no particular order, they may be added to as I remember more amazingly awesome moments from some of the most exciting Games I can remember.
1. Having the games at home, and broadcast at times that don't require me to stay up till one am to watch an event live. This was of course negated by the fact that I stayed up late to watch replays, highlights, and interviews anyway.
2. My father getting a 'shout-out' during the ladies super combined downhill. This guy had worked tooth and nail and plates in his leg to make this course, and on a beautiful sunny bluebird sky day the woman were attacking the course. Brian Stemmle was commentating and taking the viewers, people from around the world, through the course. As they passed over Rod's Route, Brian said 'this course was named after Rod MacLeod, a guy who put his heart and soul into this course'. Quite possibly the proudest moment of my life.
3. The spontaneous renditions of Oh Canada heard throughout Canada. I was privy to this outburst of pride on the bus from Squamish to Whistler. There are no words for moments like that in life.
4. Watching friends, neighbours, skating buddies, and people I went to school with compete at home in the Olympic Winter Games. So very cool to watch, so emotional to witness, and very surreal to know that I shared bath water with some of these people and changed their diapers. Makes you feel a little lazy and less accomplished!
5. Alex Bilodeau and his family. The first gold medal meant nothing compared to his story and relationship with his brother. If you didn't cry watching Frederics' reaction of his brothers gold medal run than you don't have a heart.
6. Long track speed skating: It's way too stressful for me to watch. And after all the training they have put in these elite athletes are still laid flat out on the ice after a strenuous 10,000 metre race. So exciting, and I loved how the Richmond Olympic Oval simply became the ROO.
7. Short track speed skating: it's way too stressful for me to watch. Seriously!! So much drama unfolded and intense exchanges and crashes and disqualifactions. The team relays were mesmerizing and 45 laps of a rink went by in a blink.
8.Britt Janyk's recovery during the Super G. This woman flew over Frog Bank and was headed to a spectacular fall. You have to see it to appreciate it but she has some serious core muscles to be able to get back on both skis. She should win a medal just for that.
9. Jennifer Heil. After a stupid question from a reporter about how it felt to lose gold she responded with 'I didn't lose the gold, I won the silver'. And she donated $25,000 to Right to Play, a move followed by many other Canadian athletes after her. Classy, dignified, and downright ballsy.
10. Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir. If you weren't a fan of ice dancing before you were after they skated. It seemed like they knew they were going to win as they skated. And you felt like you were at their wedding as they stood at the top of the podium. Now just hurry up and fall in love already so we can all sleep soundly at night.
11. Charles Hamelin and Marianne St-Gelais. These two are not afraid of showing how they feel. They love each other, they support each other, they get ridiculously excited when watching each other compete. Their leap over the boards to embrace after Charles win was the cutest thing since Virtue and Moir.
12. Crosby's Golden Goal. The country had written the ending to this story already, now we left it up to Crosby to direct it. And boy did he. It was always going to come down to Crosby. It had to be Crosby, that's how fate or destiny or whatever you want to call it works.
13. Jon Montgomery. His run, his reaction to winning, his stroll through Whistler Village, his reaction to the pitcher of beer. Most athletes would have ignored that gesture- he embraced it and drank it like it was his last day on Earth. Well it wasn't- it was his best day, and we loved him for being human (and a beer drinker.)
14. Joannie Rochette. The strongest woman I know, except I don't know her. I don't know where she found the strength. She skated, she fought through every minute of her long program with sheer will. She finally broke down and let us witness her grief. She won the bronze but it didn't matter. She skated for her mom, and a country cried for her.
15. The Canadian athletes that did medal, every single one of them 'shared it with Canada.' Typical selfless polite Canadians, they thanked the crew workers at the venues, the volunteers, and everyone that had helped them get to where they were. You're welcome.
How many days till London 2012???
1. Having the games at home, and broadcast at times that don't require me to stay up till one am to watch an event live. This was of course negated by the fact that I stayed up late to watch replays, highlights, and interviews anyway.
2. My father getting a 'shout-out' during the ladies super combined downhill. This guy had worked tooth and nail and plates in his leg to make this course, and on a beautiful sunny bluebird sky day the woman were attacking the course. Brian Stemmle was commentating and taking the viewers, people from around the world, through the course. As they passed over Rod's Route, Brian said 'this course was named after Rod MacLeod, a guy who put his heart and soul into this course'. Quite possibly the proudest moment of my life.
3. The spontaneous renditions of Oh Canada heard throughout Canada. I was privy to this outburst of pride on the bus from Squamish to Whistler. There are no words for moments like that in life.
4. Watching friends, neighbours, skating buddies, and people I went to school with compete at home in the Olympic Winter Games. So very cool to watch, so emotional to witness, and very surreal to know that I shared bath water with some of these people and changed their diapers. Makes you feel a little lazy and less accomplished!
5. Alex Bilodeau and his family. The first gold medal meant nothing compared to his story and relationship with his brother. If you didn't cry watching Frederics' reaction of his brothers gold medal run than you don't have a heart.
6. Long track speed skating: It's way too stressful for me to watch. And after all the training they have put in these elite athletes are still laid flat out on the ice after a strenuous 10,000 metre race. So exciting, and I loved how the Richmond Olympic Oval simply became the ROO.
7. Short track speed skating: it's way too stressful for me to watch. Seriously!! So much drama unfolded and intense exchanges and crashes and disqualifactions. The team relays were mesmerizing and 45 laps of a rink went by in a blink.
8.Britt Janyk's recovery during the Super G. This woman flew over Frog Bank and was headed to a spectacular fall. You have to see it to appreciate it but she has some serious core muscles to be able to get back on both skis. She should win a medal just for that.
9. Jennifer Heil. After a stupid question from a reporter about how it felt to lose gold she responded with 'I didn't lose the gold, I won the silver'. And she donated $25,000 to Right to Play, a move followed by many other Canadian athletes after her. Classy, dignified, and downright ballsy.
10. Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir. If you weren't a fan of ice dancing before you were after they skated. It seemed like they knew they were going to win as they skated. And you felt like you were at their wedding as they stood at the top of the podium. Now just hurry up and fall in love already so we can all sleep soundly at night.
11. Charles Hamelin and Marianne St-Gelais. These two are not afraid of showing how they feel. They love each other, they support each other, they get ridiculously excited when watching each other compete. Their leap over the boards to embrace after Charles win was the cutest thing since Virtue and Moir.
12. Crosby's Golden Goal. The country had written the ending to this story already, now we left it up to Crosby to direct it. And boy did he. It was always going to come down to Crosby. It had to be Crosby, that's how fate or destiny or whatever you want to call it works.
13. Jon Montgomery. His run, his reaction to winning, his stroll through Whistler Village, his reaction to the pitcher of beer. Most athletes would have ignored that gesture- he embraced it and drank it like it was his last day on Earth. Well it wasn't- it was his best day, and we loved him for being human (and a beer drinker.)
14. Joannie Rochette. The strongest woman I know, except I don't know her. I don't know where she found the strength. She skated, she fought through every minute of her long program with sheer will. She finally broke down and let us witness her grief. She won the bronze but it didn't matter. She skated for her mom, and a country cried for her.
15. The Canadian athletes that did medal, every single one of them 'shared it with Canada.' Typical selfless polite Canadians, they thanked the crew workers at the venues, the volunteers, and everyone that had helped them get to where they were. You're welcome.
How many days till London 2012???
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